On rainy days, I wish I had a long, pointy umbrella

To keep with the theme thusfar, I suppose this post could also be called "Idiotic Things People Do in New York City #3: Be in my way." However, this issue is not unique to NYC and is more annoying than idiotic.

Commuting from the suburbs of Cincinnati to school in Clifton can be an interesting, patient-testing experience. Whether on I-75 or on the roads around campus, one always has to keep an eye out for cars doing really stupid things (what kind of stupid things? That's another blog for another time.) I've also witnessed a little bit of insanity while walking in New York that makes me grateful that I don't want to drive here and navigate heavy traffic. However, there is another nuisance on the morning commute: foot traffic.

On my morning commute, I have to ascend 2 flights of stairs to get to my first train, exit at a station, climb another flight of stairs, walk through a tunnel underground, descend a flight of stairs, catch a second train, then ascend 2 flights of stairs again at the subway stop by my place of work. In the evening, it's the same, but in reverse.

There are two kinds of people who ride the NYC subway... those who are trying to get somewhere... and those who aren't. Unfortunately, since my work hours are a little later in the morning (9:30 am)... at least 90% of the people on the subway fall into the second group—people who aren't working and don't necessarily have somewhere to be. They amble along slowly, taking up as much space and possible, completely oblivious to the power-walkers behind them, who are about to run them over, kick them down the stairs, etc. Some have valid excuses—the disabled and elderly get a free pass on this. But the lovey dovey couple who has to hold hands and take up the entire width of the stairs? That doesn't work.

Each morning it becomes more and more apparent to me that walking is much like driving, except there's usually no large, heavy machinery involved, so people are much less worried about collisions. Sometimes Often, I feel like the subway tunnels could benefit from lanes and traffic signals—but then again, looking at my first and second posts... no one would follow them. But how helpful would it be, if slower foot traffic stayed to the right, allowing the faster traffic to pass on the left? Or what about those times the oncoming foot traffic decides to occupy the whole width of the subway tunnel? Wouldn't a median be nice? And when it comes to intersections... right now, it feels like dodgeball or human bumper cars. How about traffic signals? Yeah... waiting at a red light would be just as much of a nuisance as on the road, but it's only a matter of time until we hear about ten body pile-up, caused by the collision of multiple directions of foot traffic.

One of my big pet peeves when driving is missing a green light because the car in front of me is driving so slowly. Likewise, it drives me nuts when I just barely miss a train and know I could have made it if it weren't for the slow walkers. This is most annoying when I can't descend the stairs fast enough because everyone else is taking up too much space and taking their sweet time. Kicking people down the stairs is really not very nice, but when you don't move the side to allow me to pass... I consider it.

And that is why I should really carry a long, pointy umbrella... even on sunny days.